As humans, we are so adapted to the hustle and bustle of life and have lost the art of rest. I know a lot of people who have retired but have not retired in their minds and heart. This is excellent, on one level, because we need a reason to get out of bed in the morning and have something to look forward to on a new day.
It’s lovely to learn new things and accept new challenges that stretch us and make us grow. However, for many people, their mind is still in employment mode, so they just find it challenging to stop and cannot allow themselves to rest.
Betty
I know a lovely couple who are in their mid-80s. They have been retired for many years. Betty says that she feels guilty when she sits down in the afternoon. She doesn’t get out of the house much because her mind and heart are still in work mode with the many chores in the house. Is it any wonder that she had a massive heart attack and now is pumped up on medications that have a lot of side effects?
The family doctor told her that her condition is due to stress. The stress was caused by a lack of rest, putting great strain on her heart, and causing it to fail.
Mary
Then there’s Mary, a pastor’s wife who I knew many years ago. Mary had young children to run after so would get little rest. Mary was always busy, both at home and church and she never gave herself a day off or did anything that gave her pleasure. If she wasn’t working at home, or at her paid employment, she was working in the Church to support her pastor husband. Sadly Mary suffered a debilitating stroke at 34 years of age. When she received her diagnosis, it revealed that it was high-stress levels causing her blood pressure to rocket, which in turn caused the stroke. She literally wore herself out!
Max
Now meet Max, who after retirement wanted to take up running and other healthy pursuits. However, into his retirement, he continued to stick to a work schedule to give him a structure for his day.
Max’s schedule was 12 hours in duration- after all, he was home and could work longer hours because he didn’t waste time traveling. Max accomplished more in a day at home than she ever did in the office which had a limited working time frame.
He always said that he wanted to wear out and not rust out. So, Max created for himself a tight daily schedule that exceeded the one while employed. In the end, Max was putting upon himself a heavy workload and was so busy that he could not fit in his much-wanted running program.
Then one day, Max on the spur of the moment without any preparation, decided to do a vigorous run. Max reasoned that he had to start sometime, so he geared up in running shoes and shorts, Max did not have a lot of time to spare, so without warming up, and taking things slow, he ran flat out to reach his goal.
Max was found dead on the pavement. The coroner said that he had a massive heart attack due to great strain on his heart. Max didn’t take the time to ease himself into gentle exercise until his body adjusted to it. For Max, it was his first run and his last.
The Art of Rest
I could share much more stories with you, but the thing is, what all these people have in common is that they abused their bodies by refusing to take rest and or relaxation. These dear folk had to get stuff done and we’re always in a hurry to achieve the end result. We need to accept, and indeed rest, pleasure, enjoyment, and refreshment, are gifts from God.
Who’s Driving You?
Have you heard the expression being “driven”? When one drives, they are behind pushing forward. When one leads, they walk ahead paving the way forward and they see the dangers ahead and clear them for you to pass, keeping you safe.
On the other hand, when you are “driven”, you don’t always see the warning signs. When we fail to see such sighs, we plough ahead and meet the dangers head-on just like, Betty, Mary and Max.
When we retire that it does not mean we abrogate responsibility for the care of ourselves. We have a duty to nurture our own well-being. We are holistic beings, which means we are body, mind, and soul. We must learn self-nourishment on all levels. Although it does not come naturally for many of us, we need to pause, think and do something about it.
Fill Your Well
We need to change our mindset by educating ourselves about how to consciously replenish ourselves. In so doing, we replenish our creative selves. Julia Cameron, who wrote the Artist Way, calls this filling the well, it is only you who can fill your well. The book is available at Amazon in most countries- give it a read-it may help you.
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Remember you only have one life, so-
Live Life on Purpose in Faith, Hope, and Love – Paula Rose Parish
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I have worked internationally with over 40 years of experience, having a Bachelor of Pastoral Counselling and Theology and a Master of Arts in Counselling & Professional Development. BACP Life Coaching Certificate. I currently work as a Christian educator, blogger, and author, and I am a grandmother and live with my two dogs in Wales, UK.
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