Rebuilding Trust: What to Do When You’re Scammed.

After searching for a reliable worker, I employed one to refurbish my bathroom. His name was Shane, and he seemed knowledgeable and personable. Shane was recommended, so I was confident I was employing someone I could trust and rely upon.

Shane promised the job would take two weeks. He gutted the whole room leaving only the pipes. Everything was gone from floor to ceiling. After three months, only 30% of the work was done. My bathroom was a building site. The only bathroom in the house was unusable, which was a tremendous inconvenience, as you can imagine.

I did what I could to motivate Shane to finish the job, but he kept saying he had other jobs to do first. He didn’t care that I had no bathroom and ignored my phone calls. This is a massive problem because of my background in abusive relationships. So I tend to shy away from anything contentious.

I am not cynical and try to accept people at face value. Unfortunately, scam artists gravitate toward people such as me.

Shane agreed to refurbish my bathroom within fifteen days. I paid him £1400 worth of materials to proceed with the job but never received them.

This Shane ignores all my emails, text, and phone calls. So I resorted to using a friend’s phone because it was a number he didn’t recognise. He answered but quickly hung up when he discovered it was me. Shane has avoided me at all costs.

I had enough. So I sent an official letter to Shane. The letter said I would take him to court if he did not pay me back £1400. He owed me for services and materials That I had not received. I never heard from him again. After much investigation, I could not locate him. It was clear Shane had disappeared.

I’m pensionable age; he has taken advantage of that. But is also taking advantage of my good nature/naïveté. I have always wanted to think the best of people. I would never lie to anybody or deceive them, certainly not scam them.

Because I would not scam anyone. I automatically assume that others have the same point of view, which has done me no favours.

I am not a millionaire or a leader in business matters. I am soft-hearted. I am a nurturer, a healer. But does this mean I should become cynical to avoid being taken advantage of?

I don’t know the answer to that. I am seriously out of pocket because of Shane. You may relate to what I am saying. Perhaps you have also been taken advantage of in some way.

This post will help people who have been taken advantage of. Perhaps you have been promised the world and have come up empty-handed. You may be trying to claw back everything that you have lost. You may have suffered financially, lost the love of your family, or lost your home as I have in the past. I have lost jobs and my identity because I believed the promises of someone I trusted.

When I first became a Christian at 20, I was told I would understand everything. I was assured that I would have all the answers to my questions. I trusted and believed what I was told.

But 40-plus years on, I realise that God’s ways are not ours. How can we possibly know the mind of God and understand everything? If we did, we wouldn’t need faith- would we?

In our struggles from day to day, we can learn to be self-aware. Self-awareness is essential to help us through tough times. Which is why I practise and teach mindfulness. Mindfulness helps us become aware and sensitive to what we experience momentarily. And I believe in God’s ability to see us through difficult times, guiding us toward awareness of who and why we are.

I don’t know what tomorrow holds, and you don’t know what tomorrow holds. But God does. And trusting in God equals faith in God’s ability to see us through to success.

I have moved away from familiar things to find accommodation that I can afford, so I have no family around me. I have no personal friends who live close to me, either. I realise others are worse off than me, so I reach out to the suffering, trying to share hope and love with all I can. I share my experiences and expertise as they may help someone else.

I rely on God to fill me with grace to overflow though prayer. I believe with all my heart that connecting with God through Jesus Christ is possible for everyone. I have experienced it, so it is also possible for you!

I hope my suffering reaches you, helping you realise you are not alone.

In this post, I’ve moved away from my usual approach. I want to reach your suffering heart because I have been in that place. I have always had difficulties but didn’t know how to communicate them.

Your Wellness Matters reaches out to women, particularly with help in health, wellness, mind, body and spirit. I want to help those with faith and those without faith. I love to reach out to those who desperately need hope and the grace of their lives to keep ongoing.

I am still looking for all the answers. But I know our sufferings, fears, and disappointments can be turned into faith, hope, and love. If we are open, we can heal and find happiness once again. We must ask God to help us and rely on faith, hope and love to get through each day.

This post will help people who have been taken advantage of. Perhaps you have been promised the world and have come up empty-handed.

However, if we keep the faith, God can restore?—?and will restore. We have our times when we cry and mourn. But then we strengthen ourselves in the power of God’s might. We will get there, yes! We will get there!

Thank you for reading to the end. For more Tips, visit, Your Wellness Matters. www.paularoseparish.com. We collect Donations for Welsh Women’s Aid. If you wish to donate, click HERE.

I have worked internationally with over 40 years of experience. I have a Bachelor of Pastoral Counselling and Theology and a Master of Arts in Counselling & Professional Development. BACP Life Coaching Certificate. I currently work as a Christian educator, blogger, and author. I am a grandmother and live with my two dogs in Wales, UK.

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